“Zen Juggling”

…”DEADEYE THE DARING!”
The arena was plunged into darkness. Seconds passed, and the crowd began to murmur uneasily. Then a dim, purple glow rose from the center ring. A drooping face with a wild, lopsided grin. One eye rolled uncontrollably. The other soaked in its surroundings.
The figure gave a slight bow, and then tossed four objects into the air. They were torches that burst into orange flames as they reached their highest point, leaving trails as they came tumbling back down. No sooner did one drop into his hand, was it again flung up into the air. Faster and faster the torches spun through the air, to the delight of the awe-struck crowd.
There was a frantic drumbeat that seemed to pace the juggler’s flashing hands. Other than that, not a sound could be heard.
To most, it appeared to be a feat of great concentration. For Deadeye, it was second nature. Here, in this moment, the Juggling Jester felt true peace descend upon him. His hands moved like separate entities. He did not see or hear the crown. Nothing existed but self, one with his props.
Deadeye was juggling. He was Zen.

“You Bet Your Life”

Every performance is a gamble; your life is the stake. Sing the wrong note, take a wrong step, or whip the lion just a little too hard, and it could all be over for you. Pull off that one legendary performance, and you could go right to the top. Either way you’re screwed.
If you flop, people will always remember your failure. It takes a lot to ever recover. If you are amazing, you will never again match those heights of excellence. The only direction you can go is down. It’s called ‘peaking’ and it’s as much a career ender as failure.
Tonight we have seen both, and a little in between. The elephants performed a satisfactory Rachmaninov, and the monkeys were comical, but average. Manny Fats, our strongman, was… incredible, if not inspiration.
Caliberini was the big surprise. He soared to his greatest heights in a performance that left the audience in shock and wanting more. Even I was amazed, and I’ve seen it all. After 40 years as a ringmaster, its hard to surprise me, but Caliberini’s routine did just that.
Our lowest point was Whiskey’s performance. The old lion finally let the drink beat him, and it was a sad display. He could barely stand, much less jump through hoops. I won’t fire him; he has been with us for too long. He’s family. But it may be time to move him out of the center ring.
There’s still one act remaining. A personal favorite of mine. Deadeye makes his return tonight, which is always a big thing for us. Whenever he is released from Branherst, he comes back better than ever. It is like the asylum grants him a renewed vigor. Sometimes I think he has no peak. That he is in another universe all together.
So, here we go. Everything is all set for the Juggling Jester. All he needs now is for me to go out and introduce him. Into the spotlight I step, Ringmaster here at El Circa de Cykoticas.
“At last we have come to the grandest finales. Tonight you have witnessed extraordinary feats of courage, beauty, and brawn. Your eyes have feasted on the visual food of gods! But nothing has prepared you for what is yet to come. “
“Turn your eyes, if you will, once more to the center ring, where soon you will see a performance that will be talked about for years to come. Tonight, after three months we welcome back to the Big Top one of our most beloved acts! Ladies and Gentleman! Boys and Girls! Without further ado, I give you…”

“X-Rated”

If anyone knew our secret, the appeal would be lost. It’s a big deal to be a headliner. Center ring is what we all aspire to, and our act earned it. But it would all come crashing down if our secret got out.
There are three of us. My brother, Xeke, he’s the oldest. He started out with our parents and has the most experience. He taught my sister and me everything mom and dad taught him. They died when I was 6. Xeke was 15, so he took care of us.
My sister, x-tacy, is my twin. She’s got the looks in the family… We’re not identical. She also has the rawest talent of the three of us. Those two factors kind of make her the centerpiece of the act.
Me, I got the brains. My name is Xavier. It was my idea to do the whole act in the nude. After all, sex sells. Why not cash in on such a hot commodity? That’s what got us the headline spot. Acrobats are a dime a dozen, but naked acrobats… Well, you get the idea.
Collectively we’re known as Triple X. We do the trapeze, the high wire, and a number of other tricks. You should see X-tacy work a pole. The guys go mad for that part of the show.
But, for as much as the ‘sex’ sells, it’s the danger that is the real draw. People come to see us risk our lives. Secretly, they hope a wire snaps or a foot slips. They want to watch one of us tumble to our deaths.
That’s why our act would be ruined if people knew our secret. My brother, my sister, and I can’t die, or even get injured. We’re immortal… At least I think. We still get older, so maybe age will kill us, but a fall won’t. That removes the risk. That takes away the thrill. So, we keep our secret, and continue defying ‘death’… and censorship.

“Wreckage”

“We got real lucky tonight, people! Nobody got hurt when Everest came down, but that doesn’t mean we’re off the hook. I wanna know just what happened here tonight. You hear me?
The Professor was pissed; you could hear it in his voice. Not as pissed as me, of course. The Roller Coaster was my turf. She had been in the family since day one, forty-two years ago. Now she was nothing but a pile of junk. The whole dame thing had collapsed. Not all at once. A little at a time. It was slow enough to get everyone to safety, but not to save her.
I felt like crying, or screaming. It was the end of an era. My baby was dead… She should’ve had another 10 years.
I know what this was, though. I don’t know who did it, but I know someone did it. No one can tell me otherwise. I’ll find out who, and when I do, well… Payback’s a bitch.

“Vanity Plates and Bumper Stickers”

*A few of the notable displays found on the backs of Carney vehicles:


-Vanity Plates-
Bowwow- The Dog faced Boy
CNVLKNG- The Professor
MGCMAN- The Great Galetto
ZIGZAG1- Ziggy the Dragon
GOTWOOD- Max and Bucky

-Bumper Stickers-
The Dog Faced Boy- “Calm down, I was only cleaning myself”
“Looking for a good place to bury my bone.”

Ziggy the Dragon- “Objects in your bong may be closer than they appear.”
“Marijuana for president!”
“I’m not a pothead. I leave the leadership roles to others.”

Jumbo Jenna- “Caution! I brake for drive-thrus.”

Max and Bucky- “You can learn a lot from a Dummy. Who do you think taught me to
drive?”

“Under The Influence”

Any other night they would have closed the show, but with Deadeye’s big return, the Ringmaster made a switch. Maybe that’s why it happened. Maybe it was just inevitable. Whatever the case was, Whiskey screwed up and it would cost him.
On any other night the big lion had time to sober up before going on. Tonight he was rushed out first. Perhaps it would have been better to just pull out for one show, but a star never sat the bench. No matter what, the show must go on. So, go on they did. Salazar should have known better.
It began with Whiskey stumbling out like a boxer who had taken one too many blows to the head. The lion weaved his way through the ring to the edge of the first row, belched loudly, then proceeded to vomit on the patrons sitting there. No shame would have come if Salazar had pulled him out them. He could’ve claimed Whiskey was sick and the clowns could’ve come back out. But it didn’t happen.
Instead, Whiskey gave a gave a grandiose bow, stumbled back toward the stunned Salazar, and took the trainer’s whip and microphone from him. It was the liquid courage. The lion then proceeded to chase Salazar from the ring, using his own whip on him several times. With that done, he walked back to the center ring, and made a dozen or so vulgar statements before finally doing a face plant and blacking out. It was a sad spectacle.
Whiskey probably won’t remember it in the morning, but everyone else will. It is a stain on his career, one that will probably lose him his headline slot, if not his job. But, that’s fame. Here today and gone tomorrow. R.I.P. Whiskey.

“Three Piece”

Ext- The Carnival’s Midway. Three teenagers (Smoke, Diesel, and J.C.) are leaning against a game booth horse playing and watching the crowd pass by.

J.C.: Man, this place is a drag. We got anything going tonight, Smokey?
Smoke Go fetch! Nah… Uncle Lou wants us to help him out tonight, but it’s probably something stupid.
Diesel: I ain’t doing no work!
J.C.: Well, we gotta find something to do. What’s up with Ziggy?
Smoke: Dry as a bone… Dogface said old “Puffy” was blazin’ on Spinach earlier, so…
Diesel: This ain’t so bad, just hangin’ out here…

Diesel: What I mean is that it could be worse.
J.C.: What’s worse than being bored out your mind?
Diesel: Well, you could be stuck in an elevator that keeps on playing Justin Bieber over and over and over….
J.C.: Ok, I get it.
Smoke: Or you could be watching Donkey Porn.
J.C.: What the hell is Donkey Porn?
Diesel: Two donkeys going at it on camera…
Smoke: Or a donkey and something else.
J.C.: That’s sick.
Diesel: Actually, its probably not that bad… Well, I mean, if you’re a donkey.
Smoke: He’s got a point.
J.C.: Okay, but back to the original problem. We need some action.

Diesel: Well, that was something.
Smoke: Yeah… Looks like it came off of Mount Everest… I wonder if anyone was hurt?
J.C.: Who Cares? Let’s get out of here before we have to help clean it up.